Posts Tagged ‘joy’

History repeat itself…I been writing this for about three years ago and now I found myself at the same situations. I’m crying and I think it’s really time to say goodbye…AGAIN!

When it's time to say goodbye... A lot of my friends are asking me "Why are you so happy all the time?" since most of the time they did not see me crying but I was, I am just human, I cry. Well…maybe they did not see me crying in front of them because I know how to hide my true feelings, I was once a member of our theater arts guild in school way back high school days. Crying is one way of showing your emotions, showing what you really felt deep inside, showing that you're pai … Read More

via Sa Pakiwari ko…

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I am so grateful for what’s happening in my life right now. I am so blessed and overwhelmed because of what God has done in my life. God has open the flood gate of heaven for me…as what He has promised for all of us. I never ask for more than what I need but my God, our Father in Heaven pour the blessings on me. More than the money and material things He gave me Love, Peace and Joy in my heart.

When I almost give up…struggling life for nothing…I am so tired running my whole life against life, when I lost direction, when I was alone and no one is around, when I cry out but no one hears me, when I need help but no one extend hands for me, when I need someone to cry on but no shoulder to lean on…I was alone in the middle of nowhere…I’m so helpless. Giving up is my last remedy but because I am a believer of luck so it happen to me. I thought I restore all the things that I have lost, I regain a strength, draw it from family, from friends and I am just thinking that I can do it for myself but I used to fail at the end. Why I fail? Because I never submitted myself to God. I thought life will run smoothly, I think it runs smoothly but the emptiness deep inside of me everytime I get in my room and made me realized that I am still alone and no one is around, the holes in my life that keep on haunting me, I never become a whole until such I knew Jesus in my life.

I have to admit, I never knew Him, I maybe knew Him but I don’t have a relationship with Him before the way I have now. The time I knew Him, He crashed my life, He destroyed me, Jesus came into my life and destroy me, He ruined my life, I even don’t know myself anymore but He created a new me, He creates a new masterpiece in me. I can’t trace myself anymore, I am gone, I died also in the cross with Jesus and raise again into life that’s why I can’t recognize myself anymore.

Jesus came into my life to save me not to condemn. He came to give me Freedom not to prison me, He gave me Love and not to punish me for what I have done in the past. Now…my heart is filled with joy for I have live my life according to His purpose and not mine.

Who are your friends?

Posted: February 5, 2011 in Personal
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Just recently I have realized that not all angels can fly coz not all angels have wings, sometimes they are just ordinary people like you and me but they always bring the best out in you, they are the people whom God has chosen to be your friends.

I don’t know what’s the magic with friendship…there is a chemistry or physics…whatever it is, that binds two strangers to share something beyond what’s brotherhood or sisterhood all about. There is life in friendship that no one can explain why and how it’s happening to people. We can’t live alone that’s why God created friends.

Just like you, I have also my own set of friends and they are the people who were there for me in times of trials and blues in life. It’s so good to have a lot of friends coz they are the people who will left you up when you are facing weary in life. Yeah, there are times that we losses a friend because of some reason but friends will always be friends forever. There are times that you will be facing a lot of trials in life but it becomes easy and light if you have friends who are willing to share their time and their lives with you. We even have our own criteria in choosing to have friends but what’s more important is…we have someone who will always be there for us and will love us without any reservations, accepting the whole you and embracing who will you become. You can determined a real friend in times of challenges in life coz they are the people who will pick you up in times of trouble even in the midst of the night and they will take you back home.

We have to treasure old friends, they are like wines, the older it is…the more it becomes expensive. Cherish new friends they are like diamonds…the more you get closer, the more you will appreciate it.

When it’s time to say goodbye…

Posted: July 30, 2008 in Personal
Tags: , , , ,

A lot of my friends are asking me “Why are you so happy all the time?” since most of the time they did not see me crying but I was, I am just human, I cry. Well…maybe they did not see me crying in front of them because I know how to hide my true feelings, I was once a member of our theater arts guild in school way back high school days.

Crying is one way of showing your emotions, showing what you really felt deep inside, showing that you’re pain. Sometimes we cry because of too much happiness, tears in our eyes are coming without even knowing it, and you feel like that your heart is squeezed until nothing tears will fall. And you feel numb as if you can’t step your feet forward, and you feel like shouting. And that’s crying! But what if you are crying deep inside and you’re afraid to show your emotions?

I don’t know…if it’s a curse for someone like me, everytime I fall in love, I am always hurt and I don’t know why. I’m always keep saying to myself that I should not fall in love again, but human as we are, I can’t resist the dictate of my heart. I been in love for so many times and I fail also for so many times. Though, there are few whom I experienced care but it’s not love and it doesn’t last for long. Sometimes I am just telling myself that the Lord is so busy as of this time creating for the better partner I could have in my life.

…the most painful is the last one that I have.

I am blessed to know this person in my life. Sharing the laughters and tears. We been sharing the best time I could have in my life. Everytime I fall, I am pretty sure that somebody will catch me, everytime I am in the darkness I am sure that somebody’s hand will held me back into light. This somebody shows the care that I’m longing for so long. Hand in hand we are facing the ups and downs of our lives, for about a year that I am leaning on its shoulder and never heard a complain. At the end of everything leaving me is the most painful thing. Painful because I am expecting too much, It’s hard for me to let go because I don’t want to, It hurts because I can’t accept the fact that we’re just friends. The way that I was cared is something special for me, but it was just an ordinary and simple deeds for this somebody, a brotherly care.

I know prioritizing the one you love, especially a family, is not a question, well…who am I to say no for this somebody who thinks that life is dedicated to a family? I’ve realized that I am just fooling myself, making some imagination, doing some impossible dreams and hurting myself upon waking up from a very deep sleep.

I’m trying myself to hold on to the feelings that I have, trying to change my destiny, trying to be with this somebody but straightly this somebody is telling me…”you’re such a good friend, thank you but I have to go”.